true colours
show my true colours then cringe about it endlessly
starting to feel like everyone I know is getting sick of me
I always wanted to be the life of the party
but years of binge drinking have damaged my body
feel bad for talking too much
did I silence my friends?
feel bad for being quiet
am I ruining the mood?
loud and boisterous and full of doubt internally
larger than life but shrinking into me
a private poison that everyone can see
take it to the heart, I have some kind of disease
I wrote this a few years ago, but for some reason felt like digging it out again now. Socialising is exhausting.